Actually, I just have no life. But don't tell anybody that.
So here's the deal, I have a lot of stuff bouncing around in my head right now, so I'm going to write random notes to people and I'm not going to tell anyone who they are because I don't fucking feel like it and this is my blog bitches. Nothing rude or mean, I'm not writing to people I hate, just people that are or have been an important part of my life.
1) I don't really know what's going to happen to us in the future and I don't know if I want to know. I'm kind of scared to find out how all of this is going to end, because I don't know if I can take being hurt again, I don't want to hurt you again, and in the end, somebody always ends up hurt.
2) Just like everbody else, we've slowly drifted away, even though we promised we never would. I think you might be okay with that, and I don't know if I am or not.
3) I hope this is what you want, and if it's not, please don't make it seem that way.
4) It's strange how the roles have reversed with us. Now it's like I'm the one in trouble and you're the one staying out of it. I don't know if I like things this way.
5) I only miss you sometimes. Obviously you have bigger and better things going on in your life and you don't need me anymore. But I'm glad you're happy.
6) I don't want you to need me anymore.
7) If you would open your eyes you would realize what life is really all about. You're complicated and I don't really understand you at all, but I think you live inside of this box you've drawn for yourself and it would help if you learned to look deeper into things sometimes, and not just accept everything for what you think it is.
8) I'm really, really glad that we're getting closer. You've been here for me through a whole lot of stuff and I think I'd be lost without you. You make me laugh so much even though we're always kind of retarded together. Thanks for everything you've done for me.
9) You're slowly maturing and becoming more of the person that you're meant to be, but it might be happening a little too slowly and it'd be nice if you'd speed up the process.
10) I don't really know what to say to you because there's so much too say and not enough words to exactly describe it. I don't know if we can ever be "just friends" and I don't know if we can ever be more than that. I think we're hanging in the middle somewhere and we don't exactly know what to do with ourselves.
11) You're absorbed in the fast-paced life you're living now and you're floating somewhere above reality and once you come back it's going to be hell.
12) You are too much into reality and need to escape sometimes and maybe stop being so much what you wish you were and just be who you're meant to be.
and that is all.
E