Entry time, bitches.

I had ballet tonight again. It was a really good class. It made me realize what I love about ballet and why I came back. I didn't have a good class Monday, but after that class and my the rant that was my last entry, I sat down and really started thinking about what I was doing. I haven't taken ballet in a year, so of course my first class of the year wasn't going to be great. I expected too much. (I seem to be doing that a lot lately.) So I got into my determined mode again. I don't like to do things if I know I can't do them right. Therefore, when I fucked up in my Monday class, I got angry with myself. I know I'm going to have to work my ass off to make up for the time I missed this past year, but I also know that I can do it.

And that is my self-motivation for the day.

Molly and I had to go to Enloe to get our schedules changed today. We basically waited in line for an hour just to hand the lady our forms and then leave. It was ridiculous. Who the hell knows what they're going to do to my schedule. I just hope that they don't mess with my pre-calc class. There's so many people in that class and it's going to be fun.

I think I'm seriously going to miss modern this year. I know I spent 6 weeks doing it this summer, but I really love it and it's going to be weird going a whole day of school with no dance class. It's something I have to do though. Not enough periods in a day. Sigh.

I've been cleaning a lot lately. Which is a bad sign. It means I'm stressed out. I only clean when I'm stressed out. I go into super-obsessive mode and can't rest until everything in my room is completely organized and clean. I spent 3 hours dusting on tuesday. I even alphabetized my Cd's and organized my closet. I think that I believe if I can straighten out my room, the rest of my life will be in perfect order. Which is a bunch of bull shit. But it makes me sleep better at night, so whatever.

Sleep. That is something I haven't been getting lately. (Actually there's a whole this of things I haven't been getting lately. That's just one.) I haven't been able to get to sleep until about 2 or 3 am. I even try to go to bed earlier and it doesn't work. I just lay there and stare at my ceiling. Amazingly, I slept fine at governor's school..on the nights we actually made it to bed at a decent hour. (You have to understand there were 56 girls living on our hall. It was like a 6 week sleepover.) But now that I'm home, I can't anymore. Well, like I've said before, everything else in my life has pretty much gone back to normal, I guess this is just another part of it. I really hate not sleeping though. You think I'd be used to it, but no.

I think this might be my longest entry in a while. But all this self-motivation is making me want to go watch Center Stage. So I'm out.