On the way home yesterday, when I started to recognize things and realized we were getting close to Knightdale, I wasn't excited. I wanted to jump out the window and run as fast as I could back to Salem. I don't like being here. When I'm at Salem I don't have to think about everything going on here but when I'm here, I have no choice. I feel like I have no control over my emotions or thoughts. When I'm at GSW, I'm happy. All the time. It's just so perfect and I'm scared that once it's over I'm never going to be able to get that feeling back again.

Waking up in my own bed after 3 weeks of not sleeping in it, was really weird. I was so disoriented. I didn't like it.

I don't really like being home at all. The food is good, as is the air-conditioning, and it's great to see my family, but I miss everyone from GSW so much already. I can't even imagine what it's going to be like when we have to come home for good in another 3 weeks.

blah.