Why am I the one who has to feel like a trivial sideshow after everything I have put out on the table?
I'm done. And I might actually be done for real this time.
For a little while it felt good to know where my priorities lie, in friendship instead of sex. It felt wonderful. For the first time in my life I felt that I was needed and loved by men that I have had sex with for something other than sex. And then all of that was shattered.
It all always ends up shattered in the end.